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Determinational, My Book!

Friday, November 8, 2013

Don't Run For Me

The book The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz says this: "Love is ruthless; it doesn't feel sorry for anyone, but it has compassion. Fear is full of pity; it feels sorry for everyone. You feel sorry for me when you don't respect me, when you don't think I am strong enough to make it. On the other hand, love respects. I love you; I know you can make it. I know that you are strong enough, intelligent enough, good enough that you can make your own choices. I don't have to make choices for you. You can make it. If you fall, I can give you my hand, I can help you to stand up, I can say, "You can do it, go ahead." That is compassion, but it is not the same as feeling sorry."

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about fund raisers and honoring people, but I want YOU to swim/bike/run/whatever else for YOU! Otherwise I feel like a drag. I like to hear about you being healthy and doing well, loving life and accomplishing great things, and more than anything being happy. Watching you guys be awesome is so peaceful and honestly makes it all worth it to me! I've heard the best gift you can give someone is your happiness and it's TRUE! I love all of you, and it is definitely through your varied modalities of support that I'm doing better, but instead of pitying me please rejoice with me that it Works, your thoughts and efforts can help a person be independent and strong again. This week alone, I have walked over five miles, spent hours on the elliptical, and swam over a mile and a half; not to mention 2 hours of Pilates and 6 hours of therapy. ALSO eating healthy, and being super mom, and getting my house straight, and applying to residencies, and spending time with amazing friends. Not exactly worth feeling sorry for, right? ;) I still get sooo worried about the future sometimes, but this week I felt "good" for the first time in over a year. I mean my body did. The weather was beautiful, and my mind and body keep communicating better and better, and I could feeeeel!!! I didn't know if my body could enjoy being alive again. There's much more to life, believe me I found out, BUT I'm Super stoked about how good my body can feel! It's getting more confident and I'm getting mine back. SO I appreciate your help, I'm not out of the woods, but pitying me is not appropriate. Enjoying life with me is! Run WITH me! Run FOR you.

The "Mermaid" in Pilates. Everyone should do Pilates! More on this later.


This next bit makes me laugh: I had started writing this post and my right hand has suddenly started working all the way again whilst typing. So instead of typing, then pausing to think of what to say next, and then typing again, I just typed randomness. I've decided to keep it because COOL I'm going to be able to look back on the exact moment!
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I want to type this  to retrain my hands to type again. I don't even care what I'm saying at this point, just the fact tat they're working correctly and I can do this is Awesome and feels SO giod! Keep typing and keep going Hooray for healing! The big brown dog jumped over the quick brown fox.
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Then, I got tired, ha! Nic pointed out it's the fox that usually does the jumping in that sentence...oops!  It's been a good week, a fun trip to New Orleans and accomplishing my workout goals. This weekend's looking good to. Good luck to those running the Cajun Cup, and riding the Gran Fido. And everything else!

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