A Tale of Two Watches

Do you remember this post from 3 years ago? Okay OKAY I need a new watch already
Well you should be proud, because I finally got one.
Do you remember this post from 4 months ago? About My Friend Billy
Well Billy would be proud, because I replaced it with his watch.

You didn't think I would actually BUY a replacement, did you? You know me better than that by now! Things need to mean something sometimes. Billy had given it to Liam, but the kid has his own, and I needed one in the clinic. So, it's on loan as long as I use it ;)
And now Billy's indirectly helping better the lives of dogs and cats. I think he's probably content with this arrangement. I am.

Climbing

You guys have followed my training for a half marathon. You then unknowingly followed me through major depression and huge change. I always knew the hardest wouldn't be when I was still newly injured; the hardest part is going to be dealing with the chronic issues. I wasn't get any faster, not getting anywhere in life, personal blow-after-blow... I got crazy down. Out of shape. I kept pushing, failed dramatically when I ran for office. Kept pushing, found a loving relationship that failed because I had to move. Kept pushing, and guess what? I made it.

I had to move to the Woodlands, TX. I got offered a full-time job here, and it's got a good school district and a safe place for me and my kid to live. I was so sad that I could not make Louisiana work. But despite all that not wanting to move, knowing that I was moving away from so much that I loved, things are good! I am a veterinarian again, I can perform minor surgeries again, my son is stable and happy and excelling in school. We live in a nice house in a nice neighborhood. We're calm and happy. My job is basically a 9-5. I am making more money than I ever have in my life. I have huge bills to pay from the last few years, and I am good at staying humble, but, we're good! I'm good. I don't even know how to explain it. All of a sudden, we're just, good!

My dad and his cousin Lilasara came to visit for a few days. Yay family! And I have a house that I can host people in! We went horseback riding. My first time on the trails since I was hurt. I've been riding before with my Pilates/Franklin Method instructor Alyce, but that was only supervised in a ring. I was so apprehensive of going out, as weak as my injury makes me and now I'm so out of shape. I did it anyway and guess what? I made it.

I texted my PT Wulf Thoma, the superhero that helped me walk again, about my accomplishment. He said what's next, mountain climbing? Wulf loves to mountain climb, as he is from Bavaria. I said Yes! I'm on Cloud 9 from horseback riding, what would you expect from someone as driven as me. He asked if I needed a guide. WELL. Yes, yes I do. I made tentative plans to mount climb in Bavaria next year.

So less than 24 hours later I joined and had my first lesson at a climbing gym. And you know what? Holy crap I have a long journey! I don't even know if I can really do it, with the limited grip strength in my right hand, and proprioception of my right ankle... BUT, this is exactly what I need. Maybe 2 years, Wulf! But I've been every day except yesterday, and I'm just getting more obsessed. They have free yoga for members - something else I suck at. Snakebyte though is taking to the rock walls like a fish, and it is so cool to have something we can both do together.

My friend Clay, who I've never actually met in person, has been fantastic in helping me. We met over Instagram, and he has a very similar injury to mine. He has now challenged me to hanging off the pull-up bar with a goal of 10s - we both used to be able  to do multiple pull-ups, but the level of our spinal cord injury has made our grips soooo weak. He's beating me. But I'm at 6s Clay!
Clay has also sent me some stretching and strengthening moves particular to my injury. I started all that today. I ordered a TENS (electrical muscle stimulating) unit, and bought all kinds of omega 3 and B vitamins... Who the hell knows if I'll really be able to do it. But I've been here before, and this is where I'm happiest. I guess I always need mountains to climb in order to be motivated to do anything. It's a real character flaw.

There's a lot of sadness out there in my world that I can't control. People having shoot-outs with police in Baton Rouge, where I used to live and I still have connections to. Several friends have died; I told you about Billy. Also recently was Tonya and Lon and Tina, all way too soon. And there are people I love disappointing me again; though I've made far strides in accepting people where they are. I'm honestly truly concerned about the political environment.
But the things I can control. they're good. My kid is happy. My pets are happy I'm not sure I've ever been happier at a job.

So let me obsess over this. Maybe I'll fail and you'll have to help me scoop up my broken pieces off the ground, Again. But, it won't be for lack of trying.

I'm making a Google spreadsheet so you can track my progress again if you like. I promise lots of videos and photos. I'll take all the advice I can get. We'll see how it goes!

My son being awesome

I Love My Neighborhood Police Officer

Whoever you are, you'll find this story awesome.

Liam and I moved in March. He was playing at the park a couple of blocks down in our new neighborhood, alone. A concerned mom from another area didn't know who he was and called the police, worried that I may be a bad parent for letting my 9yo play at the park alone. The police came out and 2 cars followed my son, who was on his bike, home to check out my living situation. Liam couldn't stop to talk to a friend, play with a cute puppy, nothing. The officers were very nice to him and of course everything was fine, but my kid was unnerved by the whole incident. The officer put his number in my kid's phone in case he ever needed it.

The next day he returned. He parked his car in front of my house and let all the kids play in it. He said his car smelled like feet afterwards, ha! But now my son went from being the boy in the neighborhood that the cops followed to the cool kid that gave an opportunity for his friends to play in a police car.

That officer now checks up on us on a regular basis, and helped us during the flooding. I can't tell you how much better I feel knowing he's watching out for us.

About My Friend Billy

I haven't written this blog since I ran for office. I have a lot of catching up to do, and need to make my virtual book a real-life one, and yada yada yada, but my life has been crazy.

It's stable now. Normalizing. Feels weird. And awesome.

So I'm starting back by writing about somebody else, somebody who I just lost recently. Somebody who I can't get out of my head, but at the very least I know I can always find him deep in south Louisiana, in a place where almost nobody's heard of. I can always pull up a lawnchair next to his section of the wall and talk to him.

I met Billy after I had a broken neck and was helping BikeLafayette set a cycling route. He was helping too. I could not believe this tall lean muscular man had cancer! He told me that the chemo was making him sick, and so he stopped taking it. He wanted to enjoy the rest of his life. We became instant friends.

I was compelled to be standoffish with him at first. This is not usually my way; I'm usually full-forward gung-ho steamroll ahead and bulldoze down everyone. But, we were both in vulnerable spots. We both were struggling with our significant others not coping well with our ailments. I needed as little complication in my life as possible. It would be easy to fall into regret about that now; I missed out on a lot of time I could have spent with him. I can also say our friendship stayed healthy, and that is worth everything.

I ended up living alone with my son, and he ended up moving in with his parents. We did things with our kids; fishing, went out to eat, and to see movies. We went to Agave downtown Lafayette once. It was the first time he ever had fish tacos. He raved on them.

I haven't been able to eat fish tacos since. They remind me too much of him.

Rare photo when we took the kids fishing.

Billy was so busy hooking worms and unhooking fish that he

was the only one of us that didn't catch anything.

He stopped being able to ride his bike, or even travel all the way to Lafayette, and they came out with a different type of chemo so he started that. 43 is an awkward age to have cancer; your closest friends may shy away from it, and not be strong enough to handle all that you are going through. I think people get better in that respect as they get older.
I made it a point to go to his parents' house once a week. It was my Monday mornings with Billy. We were both crazy poor and I couldn't always make it. I ran for office to be able to stay in Acadiana, that started taking up all my time. I worked every other weekend out of state to stay afloat. I eventually had to move out of state. He died less than a month later. It was the saddest voicemail I ever got, Billy's daddy letting me know he passed.

My heart is still broken.

But enough of the framework.

Billy took this. Hummingbirds on the back porch.

Billy died of colon cancer in the prime of his life; a loving father, avid cyclist, fisherman... He could fix just about any vehicle you put in front of him. He was so good he could fix them over the phone. He was so good he could take a girl with a broken neck to walk around a junkyard and find things to fix her truck.

He had tremors since he was born, I think they were "essential tremors", but he never got them officially diagnosed. He did all that stuff even with his tremors. He laughed at them.

My friend was sweet and loving through the end. Very loud and outspoken on the topics he felt strongly about. Never wanted anything from anyone; hard-headed even in his worst pain. He was definitely a Cajun boy! He didn't speak Cajun (most of us don't; our grandparents were beaten in school for speaking it) but his parents do. His dad has a good relationship with the squirrel in the backyard and I'd swear she speaks Cajun. Their little dang Chihuahuas are so cute and smart too. T-Boy sings when certain songs come on, and growls and bites you if you say, "bath." Ha! We'd drink coffee, watch the birds, talk about the weather, and anything else. I had started going there to visit Billy, and those visits became the only solace I had in my life. It meant way more to me than I ever consciously knew. Know this, Billy, and I know you know. I visited as often as I could. I wish my life then was as stable as my life is now, just a few short weeks later. I wish we could have gone to the haunted trails in Scott like he wanted, and other things... I remember him calling me and telling me he knew he was going to die soon. He just knew it. Billy is not drama; it's one of the reasons we got along so well. My friend was dying. What do you say? There's no sugar-coating reality. That sucks man. At least, everybody you love knows you love them. And we love you. I wish things were different. Life's not fair. We're not perfect, but still, can't worry about what we get wrong. Life's too short, so fuck the haters.

Billy's daddy and his squirrel

I miss that guy more than I ever thought. We don't have one picture together, never thought about it. We knew each other less than three years. Life for us was always about living, not reflecting. He was so so much my partner-in-crime, my stability, my rock that was as tough and loving as me. Now I'm all alone. Without even me realizing it, he was the one person that shared everything I went through: all the pain, hurt, abandonment. Trying to be a parent and dealing with our children's feelings. How to still stay effective when society unknowingly casts you aside.
I don't know why I miss him so badly. I'm trying to figure it out; we saw each other at most once a week. There were other people in our lives. But for whatever reason, though I moved away and things are finally okay for me, I have a huge crazy void in my soul. I guess it's love. Whaddaya do. Love ya, Billy. I love you.

I'll always know where to find you now. So, we still have that.

Cute Heart Warming Goodness of Cuteness

Cute Heart Warming Goodness of Cuteness

LOCAL VETERINARIAN ANNOUNCES CANDIDACY FOR CITY-PARISH COUNCIL

Dr. Monique Koll, a local veterinarian and author, announces her candidacy for the District 5 Lafayette City-Parish Council seat. 

Koll, an Independent, currently serves as a volunteer member of the Metropolitan Planning Organization, the city-parish president’s Awareness Committee for Citizens with Disabilities and the Lafayette Consolidated Government Bicycle Subcommittee.

She was the first executive director of BikeLafayette and is president of Bike Walk Louisiana.

“My background is in helping people,” Koll said. “I have the tools and passion to be really good at identifying and implementing what is needed and wanted by the people in my district. I am fully prepared to really understand the issues and work together to solve them.”

Koll worked full-time as a clinical, emergency and research veterinarian until October 2012, when she was struck by a vehicle while on her bicycle training for a triathlon.

She was hospitalized in New Orleans for two months and suffered a permanent spinal cord injury that left her partially paralyzed. The driver of the vehicle that hit her was unlicensed and uninsured.

Four months after the accident, Koll was able to cross the finish line of the Rock ‘n’ Roll Half Marathon in New Orleans.

The following year, she walked the same marathon on her own.

“Acadiana has helped me so much during my recovery, and this is a way I can serve the same community that helped me,” Koll said.

Since then, Koll has earned a real estate license and become a Category 3 triathlon referee.

She recently published a book, Determinational, detailing her journey of recovery from the horrific crash.

Koll said when elected, she would like to work on the “dissonance” that consolidation has brought to city and parish government, as well as address the drainage issues in her district and continue her work on parishwide transportation.

Koll has one son, Liam, who is 8 years old.

“I know that I can work with anyone and believe we need someone who will communicate, collaborate and work with the rest of the council and the administration,” Koll said. “Working together is the only way we will continue to move District 5 and all of Lafayette Parish forward.”

I Need Your Help! And you can pre-order my book.

Pre-order here! Kindle Book Determinational

A great friend took me to lunch last week. We met just a little bit after I was hit when we did a KRVS radio show together. Our situations were so similar - he was riding bikes with his friend Roxanne when she was hit from behind by an unlicensed driver, breaking her neck. She died. I didn't. The world isn't fair.

BikeLafayette hosts a memorial ride every year for her. This year it's May 2nd. You can sign up here: Ride For Rox 2015

I told him life is *almost* good now. It still sucks that exercising doesn't feel good anymore, it just feels wrong because the wrong muscles are always pulling, and they always feel sticky and tight and just bad - it's a limiting factor and I'm out of shape because of it. What do you do when feeling good is out of the picture, where's motivation to work out then? Besides for that though, the only thing missing - financial independence. I feel like I keep saying this, but he said to make sure everyone knows that I need a job; his opinion is not everyone knows that. So this is me telling you: I need a job!

YES, I am a veterinarian. But there is no opportunity to do that full time here right now, or even steady part time. I do relief work - filling in when others are on vacation - but this is not sustainable just fun.

YES, I am the Executive Director of BikeLafayette. But this is not full time, we don't have the money. I'm working on it, but it may be a few years before the can have a full-time employee, and even then it may not be enough to cover my vet school loans. PLUS, we have over 2000 followers, but less than 100 paid members. Join BikeLafayette! Yall know I love this, I will always have time for it even if I have a full time job (this is how I normally operate, I never have only worked 40 hours a week), but it is not sustainable to me personally. YES to the community and I'm not quitting, but NO to it paying the bills.

YES, I am a Realtor. Who hasn't sold a house yet. I know it's off-season, and even still I've shown a few houses, but nothing has come of it yet. It's something to be patient with, but something has got to start happening for me. Here's my Facebook page: Dr. Monique Koll with Titan Realestate Services

YES, I do professional speaking! I have to start getting paid gigs. The hard part is not the talking, it's the getting connected to paying jobs. It's a market that needs breaking in to, I just have to find it.

SO, I need a job! I'm open to anything. I've developed a lot of skills that can be put to use for a lot of different things. It's the one thing that keeps me from a functionally full recovery. Please keep me in mind!

ALSO, I've committed to writing a book. Yay! Also, scary! It is fun to write, as I can be myself and as silly or sarcastically nerdy as I want, and it also churns up a lot of emotions as I go back through the things that were really bad and hard. Due date is May 20th. You can pre-order the Kindle version here! I'm going to have a hardcopy available too because I love books, and I think I'll do a Kickstarter for that in 2 months.

Recognize the pic? it's the great Cecil Fuselier. And the title is through a conversation with my friend Elise Gaudet - shout out to Elise!

Limitations Are Not Real, Blind People Can See

I don't have time to write this post. I had my first successful day working as a vet again since I got hit, and that feeling is so overwhelming that it's almost taxing. Same sense of accomplishment as those half marathons. Maybe more. The fact that I can really and truly reclaim my life again...

And tomorrow I have a talk for Kiwanis that I'm not even prepared for. I probably won't get to sleep much tonight, If you're bored call me ;) But I want to be ready for it. They contacted me yesterday for a 45 minute speech on BikeLafayette tomorrow...awesome but the time I thought I would have was spent working this last-minute vet shift. Same day that I officially took chair of our Louisiana bicycling entity. Feeling a little over-busy at the moment. Ah well, so is life, and I have got to financially be independent in order to finally be okay with everything.

Rambling. Sorry. Tired.

SO, why am I writing this? Because my very dear friend Crystal Place requested that I listen to this podcast, which I did while working, and it so accurately explains exactly what I have learned from this broken-necked experience.

It's true, true, I'll never say it's good what happened to me. You can find blessings in everything though. And what I have learned:

My reality will always be too limited to really be reality.

Profound right? I'm so so serious though. I've accomplished more that anyone thought I could. I plan on accomplishing more than that. You can't tell me no. I guess it's my punk attitude that is what does it. Wouldn't that be terrible, if I got all this way just because I'm a punk rebel? My sweet caring self that loves all of you hates that fact! I'm a professional, I live a very structured life, I am very "type A" in making sure things get done correctly. Rules (well guidelines) shape m life. But srsly, "you're not the boss of me" is what does it. 

AND NOW THERE IS SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE. That blind people can see. I didn't need this as guidance, but it sure served as affirmation. Whenever people trust God, refuse to accept their situation, fight the system, that's saying that reality is not what we think. These kids didn't let other people's fears (read: beliefs) limit them. This blind man's brain shows he is seeing. Listen to this:

544: Batman

It's a whole new way of understanding coming out now. Epigenetics - our behavior CAN change our genetic expression,and that change can be inherited. Your mind can control chronic pain. I can freaking practice veterinary medicine with a broken neck. Blind people can see well enough to ride a bicycle. Mind over matter. Will over reason. When the imagination and the will are at odds, imagination always wins out. I think there will always be limitations. But never believe in anything. If you don't believe in the stars, they will still exist. Same with "real" limitations. No sense in artificially creating more.

Rules are for the irresponsible. -ME

In Memory of My Cousin

When I was a kid, this long-haired hippie cousin of my Dad's would come stay with him in New Orleans. He was so crazy and full of life...I always looked forward to his and his daughter's visits. He gave me my copy of The Little Prince, and when I was older Anne of Green Gables. He always gave books away - maybe that's where I got that habit from - but I kept those. I visited him at his place in San Jose del Cabo, where the trailer I stayed in got broken into and all my stuff stolen in the middle of the night. I had dreamed of a cattle stampede that night. My Covington High duffel bag was found months later by Mexican authorities, I still have it. I don't remember him always being the most responsible, but I will always cherish my memories of him, and his crazy reckless life-loving freedom I've kept more than a little bit of.

2015 Resolutions

Happy New Year! I hope your NYE was as great as mine was. You know, I just spent all this time writing about the sweet family my kid and I hung out with last night, and how the boxing gym moved and the awesome posters we got from there and how much I love the boxing community here, and how great my friends and family are with the most thoughtful presents and helping me out, but the list just went on forever, so I erased it and replaced it with this sentence. Love all of you!

I feel like I lost two years of my life. I know this isn't true, but I was just about 35 when I was hit, and I keep thinking that I'm 35. I guess my life was so disrupted. I'm finally identifying with my age of 37, which I'm taking as a good thing.

I'm writing this blog post to have publicly my goals for the year. I'm not big on resolutions really, but I do believe in goals. I'm incredibly ambitious. Here we go!

*Publish my first book
*Paid speaking engagements
*Successful real estate agent
*Get down to racing weight again - I personally think I am prettier with a higher fat % than that (not to an unhealthy level of course!), and it's going to be hard because my cardio opportunities are limited, but I am faster with a lower percent and if I'm going to continue to race/rock climb/etc it's what's easiest. Oh well.
*Be a responsible millionaire by 2017. I am serious.
*Run. I am aware of the issues with this statement.
*Maintain Lafayette's unique culture by keeping our transportation options open.

AND, to continue to be a part of and relate to my community. You guys. All of you. I cherish my personal relationships and I never want to blow anyone off due to perceived lack of time, or compartmentalizing, or whatever. It wouldn't be on purpose, but I want to make sure that going forward, and continuing to meet more people and discover more microcultures, I stay personally engaged and not elitist. Love you all, happy holidays!

2014/2015 NYE Bonfire

A Lot of Things Happened On The Way From the BikeLafayette Meeting

Last blog I talked about my new notebook and how I am scholarly dedicated to the different spokes of my current life in the scientific faith that it will all synergize into something bigger. Today was typical for that!
We had a BikeLafayette meeting today, it was great! We're in a growing phase, which is sometimes uncomfortable and always productive. We have the right people to weather the transition to a more pronounced organization, and it's really awesome to work with people that care enough about it to get details figured out. Always my favorite thing, to build something with hard-working people. Love all of you!
And MAN it was storming! On the way home I got a message that my Realtor business cards were in, woohoo! My "Realtor" spoke has been a bit neglected this week. I was close to the office and swung by to get them. Gabe Lewis, the broker I work under, and I gabbed a bit - I want a stand-up desk at like my friend Teylor Feliz - and at the first sign of a break in the weather I ran out!

But I was so excited that I wanted to distribute my new cards right away, so I stopped at the Starbuck's on Ambassador in front of Wal-Mart to drop some off. It started raining hard again, but yay my Evangeline Toastmasters buddies were there, the President and current VP of Public Affairs (well, current until now, hang on...). They also know my broker Gabe, both socially and he's a Toastmasters member too. They were super eager I showed up as they just were discussing how I should take over VP of PA and he should become VP of Education. And you know, why not? It's still in line with my "Determinational Speaking" spoke, and there's that inter-relation with my "Realtor" spoke, so just furthering the Monique Wheel right along. So, done!

And then I get home, and in the mail was a letter of official acceptance onto the City Parish-President's Awareness Committee on Citizens with Disabilities. I wanted on the committee as I am becoming more involved with city planning as a bicycle advocate, and we're only comfortable advocating for every "vulnerable road user", and hell I personally just need to be on this board. Sooooo awesome, this furthers my "City Planning through Bicycle Advocacy" spoke.

SO goes my life right now, budgeting my time and having clear goals moving forward for these individual spokes of my life. A little scared about the present I guess - really scared actually - but excited for the future. A good friend of mine who just moved away with his family that I adore :( (that's them here: Hy-Vee Kids Triathlon), told me about his super power. He can see what people are really thinking. He's surprised me a couple of times with that without even knowing. One thing he was very direct about with me was I don't trust things to happen right. I try to control too much. I start arguing, and he says, "Look at that tree out there. You see that tree? Is there anything wrong with it? No. It's a perfect tree. How can it be otherwise? Same with everyone. Same with you." That grounds me. I got really depressed last night, it happens, and eventually I thought about that and it calmed me. What if I just let go and let what's going to come of my life come about? It's too complicated, I can't know how all the pieces work together yet. But it will, there's no other way. Even my major stressor, money, is part of that. Patience, and hold the course. Look for blue not yellow. Thanks Mike.
I believe we all have a super power. Mine is something to do with seeing the bones of things, through all the flesh; and for always getting to the next step and being resourceful enough to figure out what the next step is. I'm still figuring out how to define it. Someone else's super power is knowing the end at the beginning, and making perfect decisions based off that. Somehow, he can tell where the talent of someone is leading. I'm convinced everyone has one, I like hearing about them. What's yours?

The School of Monique, and Niche Theory

 Transitions have started being a catch phrase for my life. I love the term because it makes me think of triathlons. I have a soft spot for triathlons. And heavy metal. Weird combination I know.

 I have several things going on in my life right now with two main objectives: running and making money. Running, because, running; and making money because I refuse to lose my house and my autonomy because of some random unlicensed driver. So I am literally working nonstop to make all this work. Nothing is 100% yet. But FTW I got this.

The Spokes of my Life:
Vet Med
Professional Speaking
Real Estate
City Planning through bicycling advocacy
Running

My new thing to work on running is hypnotherapy. I hope you know by now that I don't believe in crap, but I do believe that to stop my hypertonicity I have to get my brain in the right place to correctly interpret the signals from my body getting garbled from my spinal cord injury. I believe this is possible with high repetition and lots of focus. I'll let you know how it goes.

The rest of my life, well, it's weird. I never have believed that everything happens for a reason but...maybe. Maybe not. I do believe that all the different little pieces in my life are forming a conglomerate in a way that I'm not fully aware of just yet, and I have to stay calm and keep on keepin' on for those things to come together to form whatever I'm becoming. Sounds weird? Let me tell you about something I learned in microbiology called "niche theory" (you didn't forget I was a nerd, right?) There's a lot of different definitions, but here's my general personal interpretation. Niche Theory - a species evolves and thrives in a way that fits the space in its environment. That's me.

The breakdown:
*Given my veterinary background and all the stuff I've already accomplished, that's my drive and my confidence. I'm currently looking for part-time and relief work. I love vet med, and even though it's not paying off right now I can't give up on it. I've got to dedicate even just a little of my time every week to keep up.
*Professional speaking - I love this! I am officially taking paying speaking jobs, contact me if you know somebody interested. My main focus is dealing with change, adverse or not, and the power of accepting and giving help; working as a team. I'll travel anywhere in the US, and out. I now recognize the value of my flexibility and how it's gotten me through all this, and I love to help people recognize that in their own lives.
*Real Estate - against my personal thoughts on how I thought this would be boring, I love it. It's not just about dressing cute and showing houses, it's about neighborhood and community building. I have gotten very emotionally involved in this aspect, and I love that I had the forethought to become a licensed Realtor and have this direct line with the citizens. I've just volunteered to be part of the local and state Cultural Diversity and Legislative Committees so that I can even further directly help the people I am working with. It's all playing into my bigger life plan which is helping my community be happy. I owe Acadiana, the people here have done so much for me!
*Being the new Executive Director of BikeLafayette that developed out of a horrible freaking experience from getting hit by an unlicensed driver, that's been maybe the best thing that could have happened out of this. The timing and place was great as Acadiana is moving quickly to being a happy and cycling/pedestrian friendly place to live. It puts me in a position where I can really influence the direction our city is taking. I LOVE city planning, it's caught me almost as much as vet med! I've been able to meet with various city planners ranging from the MPO/LCG, downtown Lafayette, and the coteries of the Acadiana neighborhoods. I am in a position where I can be a hub for various projects and things are already being accomplished. I'm now also helping head up a statewide bicycling legislation - Bicycle Louisiana if you will, name has not been decided yet! On both the local and statewide aspects we have decided that we will advocate for all "vulnerable road users" - bicycles, pedestrians, and disabled, and transit, - as what's good for one is good for all.

SO you can see, lots of new stuff for me to learn! Life is chaotic, but physics tells us that chaos will synchronize and spontaneous order will form. I have to be organized enough to make sure I focus on all these things, and put the time into learning it. I have a new notebook with 6 different areas that I call the BOOK OF LIFE to keep me on track. It really is like going to school and learning all these classes for a degree, I just don't know what that degree is yet. MoM - Master of Monique? ;) I've got to be successful financially and personally, I'm determined. I don't know the outcome yet...just focusing, working hard, and staying on track. What a nervous/exciting place to be! Life is all about being able to survive that strain to make it.

Hey I never said "artist" was part of all this! Love all of you!

BDv.37: Public Speaking and Triathlon Winning!

My favorite thing about this pic? Scars. That big one on my neck, the nasty one on my arm. For me this pic denotes the reason for persistence beyond disaster more than any of the others ever taken.

My birthday is tomorrow. I just read over my post from last year for my birthday, and it's a lot of the same thing; glad I'm not in the hospital, yadayadayada. I have gained weight since then, I was right on track with that one! My time for walking has not consistently significantly improved, but that's a matter of time right now. I talked about swimming 1000 yards for the first time since I was hit, and this year if they wouldn't have canceled it I would have raced 1500 open water. Here are the posts I'm referring to in case you're interested: October 2013 Posts

BIG things for me include continuing on this determinational (my term!) speaker path; that talk I gave to the UL Softball team solidified to me that that's what I want to do, speak with athletes and other determined people. My amazing friend Annette and I are going to give our first joint talk together this week for the UL Disabilities kids. We ROCK together; this is my favorite blog post of mine you should read it: 2014 (Inaugural) Zydeco Half Marathon Race Report by SPECIAL GUEST Annette Coussan (with commentary by me) ;) I am super stoked about this direction in my life and I'm going to start putting my effort into it, starting right now. It's been hard finding a direction to try to get income with, but I think overall this is a good one.

ALSO THE BIGGEST NEWS YET! This is what makes this birthday the best ever When I was racing, that brief time in my life before I was hit, I got 1st AG at the Miles Perret Triathlon at UL. Two days ago I did the swim leg of a relay team for the UL Tri, which is basically the same course. Mary Hays of GEAUX RUN asked me and Sarah Tennison, swim coach at Swim Fit, if we would do it with her. We came up with the name "TriAngels" because I love a play on words, and Sarah drew this awesome symbol for us:

SO cute, right? I had not met Sarah before we had decided to relay together, but she is so happy and charismatic, and focused; I loved her instantly. Somehow the three of us quickly made a winning team, and we WON the relay for this race! This is a non-sanctioned short sprint tri; 200 yard swim, 8.5 mile bike, and 2.5 mile run, so the competition isn't as fierce as for other races. Having said that, we were 18/106 OA (I'm going to include guys and girls), my swim was 82 (so I beat about 1/4 of the people there, and I thought I would be last!), Mary was 16th off the bike and Sarah 16th off the run. I've got some fast friends ;) But honestly, we pulled it together without ever racing together before and we rocked it. Love these girls, I hope there will be chances for us to work together in the future.

Mary going into T2

T2

Sarah leaving T2

We're so awesome!

Jamie Blanchard is the super-sweet fiance of Dustin Duval, both are great people!

Doc Z I posted this pic for you, my favorite cycling jersey!

Newspaper Column on Bicycling

I started on with Lafayette's The Advertiser. Check it out! This pic is of my bike that was smashed up by that stupid car. It's name was "Crotalus" for two reasons: 1) It's the rattlesnake genre - do you know rattlesnakes have fast-twitch muscle fibers in their tails that never tire? 2) Crowie Alexander is a triathlete crush of mine. YAY look for it every Thursday at noon!

Growth of City Means More Cyclists

10 Days Before the 2-Year Anniversary of When I Was Hit

October 1 is always going to mark 10 days before the anniversary of my failed attempt as a speedbump for a career (just stole that from Ian Fairclough, ha!)

My birthday is also in October, and my favorite holiday, and I love Fall and pumpkins and camping so it's not really a bad time for me, just thoughtful. Glad I'm not in a hospital missing my favorite time of the year. You know this time of year has the best sunrises and sunsets? Glad I'm strong enough again to tie my shoes and feed myself and limp, if not walk well or race. Glad I can swim. Glad I can raise my son. So far to go still...but anyway.

AND life is moving on. I renewed my vet license and I'm finding out I can do some things I didn't think I could, like pull blood and give vaccines. I'm also finding out that things that should be easy are do-able but hard, like suturing or neutering a cat. Putting on sterile gloves is my limiting factor, that's embarrassing. But I have good people to work with and I'm getting better. Most importantly I'm feeling good about my diagnosing and treating skills. I was worried I had lost them but I'm confident. The next step is relief work. So, I'm looking! There's a lot of good vets in the Lafayette area, but check out The Waggin Train. High quality medicine, super-sweet docs, and ME hanging out. ;)

I'm also now a  Realtor. It's hard to stay interested because not a lot is going on yet, but I'm stoked that I took the time out to learn a skill and get licensed in something that can give me at least supplemental income for the rest of my life. Gotta get that ball rolling more.

ALSO I am giving more talks again. I was just able to meet with the award-winning UL Softball Team. Besides for being amazing athletes and accomplishing so much on the state and national scale recently, they are incredibly sweet. Very proud to get to know them. I'm going to start marketing speaking engagements; I enjoy them and I like the connection I feel with the crowd. Toastmasters International, The Evangeline Club has been really great about getting me ready to do this, especially the President. So much good advice and direction. I'm looking at doing some along the Missouri River next summer, if ya got any leads let me know!

Which brings me to bikes bikes bikes. Because that's what's taking up most of my time right now. Now that I got a taste of freedom (I've worked or gone to school full-time or more since I was, well, since forever) I want a life where I can take off for even a month and travel. I'm planning the Lewis and Clark trail next summer.
Lots of my triathlon club members (I'm the head of the Tri-Cajuns Triathlon Club) are racing right now and I'm having fun watching them. I didn't think I would, I get really sad, but I love being surrounded by athletes and it helps me move forward. I do have a 1500 meter (0.93 mile) swim race in New Roads in 11 days, and I'm doing the swim part of a relay for the UL Tri with one of the owners of Geaux Run and the swim instructor for Swim Fit.
And I can't stress BikeLafayette enough right now! Such big happenings; this organization is growing so fast out of necessity and I'm proud to be part of it. It's a little overwhelming but it's fun to help the community in such a big way. The local government is even pushing hard for a bicycle-friendly community, which is great because we're working together and it's not an uphill battle. If you want to help support bicycling in Lafayette, and stay aware of all the progress, please go to the website and join. Increased membership is our next big step.

What I learned in 2 years. A lot, but this:
I'm not a fan of popular novels as a whole - they seem just deep enough to be interesting but always fall short of being real, but The Poisonwood Bible had something that really caught my attention. It takes place in the Congo and is written from the points of views by a crazy missionary's daughters and wife. A quote has stayed with me; one of the daughters said this about the Congolese: "Here, bodily damage is seen as a product of living, not a disgrace." That hit me hard, because I have been SO embarrassed by my injury. My weak hand, my limping. BUT that embarrassment is a product of our society, it shouldn't be a disgrace! It's hard to convince myself of that - that I'm still a beautiful and viable part of society - but I do believe it to be true even if I'm having a hard time internalizing it. And when someone cares more about your injuries and less about how you handle them...well, you're better than that. I care about how you handle all the craziness that happens in life, that is what always has been what is important. I care about YOU. I may even care about you more than you care about me but whatever, I know what I'm worth. Injury is a by-product of living. I'm not going to feel sorry for you. We got this.

Never too early to decorate for Halloween!

Up until now, I didn't have a real idea of what was going to happen. I was living in a daydream.

I'm not now, I know now what I want is not achievable.

Today, I start doing the impossible.

I even have a plan.

Determinational

Hy-Vee Kids Triathlon Championship and Elite Cup

Last Thursday night Liam (aka Snakebyte) and I loaded up a Tahoe with two other adults, three other kids, and four bicycles to make the 14 hour drive to Des Moines, Iowa for the Hy-Vee Kids Triathlon Championship. The kids have to place in the top 15 of their age group to even go, so just the opportunity to race it was an honor! We all had so much fun and the experience is a life-long one.

SuperDad Mike Singletary with John Marshall, Will, Mia, and Snakebyte at the Iowa state line

Our young Schools of the Sacred Heart triathletes, almost there!

We checked into our hotel and immediately went to the expo for packet pick-up and the race briefing. The whole thing was incredibly well organized and a lot of fun. At the race briefing we got to meet pro triathlete Hunter Kemper, who also has four kids of his own and is the HyVee KidsFit ambassador. The kids got their picture taken with him. He's such a sweet guy! The next day on the course he was out there at the swim start cheering the kids on, and we witnessed him at T2 running over without hesitation and helping a little girl who had fallen off her bike. AND the following day, he won the HyVee Elite Cup with it's $100K purse!

Our awesome kids with Hunter Kemper at the expo

Hunter pep talking the kids before the swim start

We racked the bikes that afternoon and went to sleep asap, so tired! The next morning we finished tattooing up our kids and made our way to the race. John Marshall and Will both competed in the Intermediate group which is a 100 meter swim, 4 mile bike, and 1 kilometer run. Mia and Snakebyte raced in the Junior group, a 50 meter swim, 2 mile bike, and 500 yard run.

Liam aka Snakebyte Koll at his transition. He's very organized and his transitions were so fast!

Mike got this sneaky pic of me talking to Snakebyte, I didn't know he was taking it! I love it. I don't think we should live through our kids, but I'm so glad Liam is into triathlons and I can help him even though I can't -yet- race them again myself. 

Proud Mom KC and son Will Singletary at the swim start! Will has a genetic metabolic disorder called phenylketonuria but he's so tough you'd never know. Gotta brag on KC a sec too, she is an amazing mother and veterinarian. She and Mike are raising some independent and smart kids who accomplish things despite setbacks. The future generation is going to be great with personalities like these.

Mia Singletary - that's one girl who knows she's rockin'!

The Singletary kids race for Crawfish Aquatics and had great swims! This was Liam's first open water swim race and he got a little scared, stopping for a few seconds at a buoy. But then, he decided to start up again and race! To me this is the importance of the experience. My son, all on his own, gritted up his nerve and decided he was going to do this. I *may* have teared up when he told me about it; this is exactly what a kid needs to grow up as a confident adult and it is something that I could never give him, it's something he had to do on his own. Thank you HyVee for giving him that!

The bike course was changed due to flooding, and was changed to the better! All the kids at the end said it was a beautiful ride across the bridge and their favorite part of the race.

The 5150 race. Des Moines is beautiful.

The finish was fun! Mia high-fived everyone on the way in. They all did so well!

After the race we went to Zombie Burger and Drink Lab, so fun! And the Science Museum and watched a show about Great Whites at their IMAX. I really love Des Moines, wish we could have stayed longer.

Zombie Burgers! Fun fact: we loved this place so much that we went again for lunch on Sunday and ran into Rinny Carfrae, Greg and Laura Bennett, and other pros. SEE triathletes do eat!

We went back to the expo to watch the press conference with some of the pros. I got Snakebyte's picture taken with my personal fave Mirinda Carfrae, and with Greg Bennett.

We watched the elite cup the next day, so fun! They raced right past us going into T1, then we headed to the finish line where I, because I have a broken neck, was allowed to sit right at the finish line!!! Mike laughingly makes fun of me for using my broken neck as an excuse for Everything and he's right, I'm totally an opportunist that way ;)

John Marshall hanging out with me at T1

Hunter Kemper winning!

Helle Frederiksen winning!

I got some great shots at the finish line, and that's what I'd like to wrap up with. These guys and girls were all competing against each other for big prizes, and they were so sweet to each other at the end! Hunter holding his baby, sweaty hugs between the Bennetts and Carfrae, everyone encouraging each other and hanging out with each other as they recover from racing so hard. I love what kind of example that sets for our kids about good sportsmanship all the way to the top of the sport. In their respective age groups at the national championship - top of the nation - Liam placed 35th, Mia 31st, Will 51st, and John Marshall 49th. At the very height of their pride and excitement they witnessed the top triathletes of the world showing each other respect and comradeship. I'm really proud I could witness it all.

I Need To Get Paid For Being Me (I'm pretentious I know!;)

HA! Well sorry it's been a while yall, my dog dying hit me hard, and things (good and bad) have been happenin, and I just haven't felt like blogging. But I'll get you updated.

BUSY. Here's what's happening coming up:
*Friday: Taking the test to get my real estate license, to have something to do while I'm convalescing. It's fun learning new things, and I'm really excited to work with the broker who I'll be under  - Gabe Lewis with Titan Real Estate. He's just a cool guy and I have a lot to learn. It'll be fun!
*Saturday: My great Aunt Anna is getting inducted into the Sugar Bowl Hall of Fame at the Superdome in New Orleans, and I'm giving the acceptance speech! So exciting!
*Sunday: Through Tues I'll be at the Association of Avian Veterinarians conference, to renew my vet license. My colleague Kat will be there and I haven't seen her since before clinical year. Stoked to show her my city!
*The Following Saturday: Snakebyte and I are volunteering for the Tour de Scott, the first triathlon I ever did! A bit attached to this race.
*The Following Sunday: BikeLafayette board meeting. This happens once a month but this is a big one for me for a couple of topics I'm excited about. Oh by the way I'm the Treasurer now.
*I was approached by a member of the Sierra Club at the Lon Lomas Memorial Ride (more on that in a sec) about a 55 mile bike trail on top of the Henderson levee that is already approved! Stoked! I'm gunning to get it paved, and I am very excited for those guys, they're doing a great job!
*ALSO, I met with "Red", the owner of Rukus skateboard shop here in town, about getting  the city to build another skater/BMX park to replace the Dust Bowl. UL bought the land, and while it's not happening quickly, they're are taking it (and the dog park) down. NOW is a good time to petition for it, with lots of good reasons! We can do better than the Dust Bowl anyway. Kids, need a place they can actually do something recreational and not just sit around or get in trouble. And did you know we have a nationally acclaimed skateboard team HERE in Lafayette? And Rukus even sponsors pros, but they can't live here, or come down and put on free events like they do elsewhere, because we don't have a place...ssssoooooo..... And Red has this pretty well figured out, too; cost, design, placement, petition with over 2000 signatures. He's put a lot of thought into it. Pretty excited to see it come to fruition.
DUDE, also, Rukus designed these Crawfish Boil shoes that Nike is releasing next month! Can't release all the pics yet but soooon! Rukus is having a shoe release party oh man should Definitely go! They even come with a little crawfish sack thing...stoked about them! And how awesome is it that a south Louisiana shop did this?
*My kid, Snakebyte. He's been practicing triathlon and is racing the Iron Kids Championship next month. That guy is fast! When he puts his heart into something there's no stopping him. We're planning on making the trip with the Singletarys who may be the most perfect family in the world. KC's a vet, so what do you expect? ;)

BUSY. Here's what I've done since we talked last:
*Lon Lomas was legally riding his bicycle and was killed by a hit-and-run driver. Driver was found, but this story is going to happen slowly. The local cyclists, headed up by Scott Coco, organized a memorial ride for him, and a ghost bike was erected. I was in a great position to advertise and promote it, and we had 500 riders show up. I Am Elated how all the different types of cyclists came together as one community and did this wonderful thing. I feel that this has taken a turn for cyclists in the public eye as a viable and loving community, and I am committed to taking that awareness and acceptance and promoting growth and education about cycling in the Acadiana area. My next step is starting a bicycling column to keep the public involved in cycling. It took a terrible tragedy to bring this together, but I always, as you should know about me by now, relish the good that comes out of bad.
*I joined Toastmasters. I just gave my first speech and I won Best Speaker award for the evening! Honored and humbled. Joel Dawson, the President, has been awesome about getting me on track making money giving speeches, everything from marketing to writing a book. It's been great. You guys, Toastmasters less than $100 a year and is invaluable information, you should join!
*I had my hair highlighted. You see, I've been gaining weight because I haven't been doing cardio as I should have, just muscle building. The only real cardio I can get in is on the elliptical or bike trainer and without a race to focus on it's boring. I was a little upset about it, then my friend David Billeaud (owner of T-Coon's) said, "But, you've been too skinny for too long..." And that's when all was good in my world again. I'm not racing weight, but I'm back on track with cardio, and I just can't bring myself to feel bad about myself over something like weight anymore. For better or worse. I say for better. I wanted a change, and highlighting my hair did it for me. I'd like to be a little more outgoing, outlandish. We'll see.

BUSY. Here's what's been ongoing:
*I've been brushing up on my vet skills at Waggin Train. This is a vet hospital owned by Drs. Scott and Kristin Broussard, who are also awesome triathletes. Scott's also a falconer, so cool right! I love these guys for giving me this opportunity. I'll be there hopefully every day starting in a couple of weeks. Come see me!
*Tony Quinn is a local PT, and he just got this new awesome zero-gravity treadmill which I've been using every day. It has been great, I can definitely move faster using it, up to normal walking speed. I'm at about 1.8 mph w/o it, and 3 mph with it. My right ankle and still right quads are my limiting factors. Hopeful...still down but hopeful. I'm still going to Wulf once a week, and my hand and balance are a little better every time. BUT my hand is only getting a little better, and he says he's not entirely sure I'll be able run again, in fact not likely.

Ever onward. I get down. Right now, I'm on the edge of feeling normal again but not quite there and it is exceedingly frustrating. First time in my life I've ever had trouble sleeping. Ever. This is honestly the worst emotionally I've been in my life. But there's so much good going on...things are complicated right now. Dang. Anywhere but here...this is why staying still is never an option.

*I've been hanging out with my best friend from the hospital more. He's been in a down spot and I have too. We're just not where we hoped to be in 2 years. We've decided to talk more and pull ourselves out of this funk. It's working, but no lie I've been crazy dog down about not being able to run. Dreams every single night, the seconds I can sleep. It's hard. See why I stay determined? It's not necessarily a good feeling all the time! It sucks a lot.

Here's a good wrap-up. This first pic I took about a year and a month ago and made it my profile Facebook pic. My first proof that I could stand alone without any assistance again. This second one I took this week. I have shorts on for both of them, can you see all the differences? I came up with four.

 

1) The first one, my weight shift is to my left. I can't feel my left as good as my right, and I would unconsciously shift my weight that way because that's what felt correct. Ms. Alyce Morgan Wise and her Franklin Method, along with Pilates, helped me find center again. I'm much better balanced now.
2) My knees were more turned in last year, my legs are straight while standing now because I am much stronger.
3) My right leg had lost a lot of muscle compared to my left. The difference is still there, but much more noticeable in the left pic. Anytime Fitness Upper Lafayette has really helped me with muscle building. I go five times a week, see my trainer Damien Living for two, and while muscles take months and even years to build the difference is remarkable.
4) My hair. Paige Billeaud, David's wife, really helped me through a lot when I was first hurt; heck for the last few years even. She brought me to get my hair cut short when I first got out of the hospital to make it more manageable. I agreed, because I vowed when it was long again I would be walking. I wasn't wrong and this pic proves it.
My son asked me today, did I really think he was going to be a champ? He's big into boxing though hasn't been in a real match yet, but everybody calls him champ and he wants to believe it. Our conversation: Did everybody know I could walk again? No, but I did. Not only does nobody else matter, but whatever you believe is what you are. I realistically know there's probably limitations to that but I've never personally found them and I don't suspect I will. Somehow there is more to life than everything realistic. Will over reason. I asked him what he thought, and he knows he's a champ. I know I will run again.
Scared I'm going to be a sad case that you really want to see run again but never will? Yes. But I have no choice, I'm not accepting where I am now, not ever.